#i didnt have an ending for it but...now im thinking | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

seokmn · 3 days ago

Text

chapter 15.

wc: 1.9k words

chan spent hours and hours thinking about what to do. he even reached out to his parents, having a long conversation about his wishes and future. he didnt close his eyes for more than two seconds during the whole night, just so he could finally get to his final decision: leave the company.

once he made up his mind, there was no turning back. was this decision the best for him? he had no clue, but he was willing to take the risk.

as chan was walking out of the building after ending his contract with his company for real, he wondered where would he go now, which place would be his escape from his thoughts?

he just let his body take him somewhere, anywhere that he could find a peace of mind. he walked down the very familiar path without actually thinking about it and he wasn’t surprised when he found himself standing in front of your front door.

he stared at the door for a while, torn between knocking on it or just walking away. youve been avoiding him for a whole month, why would you pay attention to him now? but at the same time, he thought that if you knew about the news maybe, just maybe, you would get back to him and everything would be back to normal.

chan clenched his fists before taking a deep breath and knocking on the door. his heart was beating faster than he expected and his mind was full with possibilities, good and bad.

it didnt take that long – although he thought otherwise – for you to open the door, the small smile on your face turning into a surprised expression. it felt like you were seeing a dead person right in front of you, not because he was dead to you, but because you didnt think he would be at your door, especially after exactly one month after the breakup.

“hey,” you felt a pang in your heart when you heard chans voice sweet like honey. you missed his voice, you missed him. “i dont know exactly why im here, to be honest. i was walking out of the company and then in the blink of an eye i was here knocking on your door.”

you were about to speak, but chan was faster than you.

“i miss you, yn. i miss your laughter, your hands hanging on the back of my neck, your smile, hearing your silly comments about whatever tv show we decided to watch, the way you would always scrunch your nose when i rested my forehead against yours after we kissed, watching you steal napkins from the restaurants we used to go to just so you could have something physical about that date to put on your journal,” his voice started to crack while his eyes held so many emotions. “i miss everything about you. ever since we broke up i didnt have one single entire day that i could look back at it and say ‘yeah, i was happy that day’. i dream of you every night, and im so tired of always crying in my room when im in my bedroom. weekends that i wasted crying myself to sleep and staying in bed 24/7.”

chan took your hand in his and squeezed it. the feeling of your hand sending him into another dimension.

“i dont want to sound like im trying to manipulate you into coming back to me,” the boy shook his head frantically. “no, i dont want that. i just needed you to know how im feeling and to know how youre feeling. do you feel the same way? tell me, yn, do you want me back as much as i want you back?”

that last phrase. that damn phrase. do you want me back as much as i want you back? yes, you wanted, but you couldnt tell him, why would you? he had a whole dream to pursue, a dream and future of a life you didnt belong in it.

you looked at his red face from holding back his tears, the sight of him like that breaking your heart just as the sight of how wrecked he looked when you broke up with him broke your heart. you tried to speak, but your voice betrayed you.

your hand met his cheek and your thumb gently caress it before you pulling him into a hug. that was when chan couldnt hold back anymore and started to tremble as sobs started to leave from his lips.

chan needed your touch way more than he thought, he hugged you deeper, tighter, making sure you wouldnt leave his grip.

“please… be mine again,” he said between his sobs. “i left the company, we can be together again and i swear nothing like that will happen ever again. i wont let it happen.”

his words made you freeze. he left the company? you immediately broke the hug, finding strength out of nowhere to fight against chan’s strength that was trapping you close to him. “what did you do?”

“i left the company…”

“are you crazy?! why would you do that? did you leave because of this relationship?”

“it was for the best, yn!”

“fuck, chan,” you ran your fingers through your hair, frustration all over your face, and guilty too. “youre supposed to be an idol, the future of kpop, a fucking shining star! are you throwing that away because of a relationship?”

chans tears turned from sad to angry tears. “i want to be a shining star only in your eyes, yn!” he shouted, you could even see the string of saliva connecting his lips. “ever since we broke up i lost all my passion for every thing i once loved, and you werent the only reason for me to leave the company, okay?! stop treating this decision of mine like it was stupid, i had my reasons!”

“so what you gonna do now? find another company? give up on your dream and live a miserable life?”

“if youre by my side, my life wont ever be miserable.”

“bullshit and you know it!” you pointed your finger at him before sighing and placing your hands on his shoulder, trying to speak with a calmer voice. “dont do this to yourself, dont make huge sacrifices for me.”

“why not? its my life!”

“did it never cross your mind that maybe i feel like shit when you do that? how would you feel if i had given up on my dream because of you? you would feel guilty, right? and dont even try to lie because i know you.”

chan stayed quiet, looking at you with his fist clenched.

“what if the love dies? we break up again and then what? youll lose your chance of doing something you wanted since you were a little boy? be rational, lee chan!”

you felt tears streaming down your cheeks and chan immediately let his guard down and reached out to wipe them off. when his warm hand came into contact with your cheek, your body instantly leaned into his touch. you missed the feeling of his hand on your face so bad.

“i love you, chan… i love you so bad,” your voice came out as a whisper. “thats why i cant do this to you. i cant hold you back from doing what you were born for. i want you to be free… please dont make this any harder for me. i cant keep pushing you away, i want to make the best decision for you. i want to see you everywhere, i want to hear about your world tour, about your face being on time square. i want you to be successful, to be able to look back at your past and be happy for making the dream of the five years old channie coming true. so please, let my love be only a memory from now on, a good and warm memory.”

chan shook his head, his lips curled downward and trembling as tears poured out of his eyes. “there has to be something i could do… a way that i could have you while pursuing my dream.”

“chan, theres not…” your voice came out softly, but full of hurt and sadness.

“if i find a way, do you promise me to be mine again? dont give me that rational smartass answers, its just if i find a way. i promise you i wont ever bother you, unless i find the solution to all of this.”

you closed your eyes and took a deep breath. that was insane, how could he find a way of being an idol and dating you? if his future fans dont make the relationship fall apart, his busy schedule will. but still, deep down you knew that he would try anything in his power to make that happen, you knew damn well how much he loves you and would do anything to have you back.

“yes.. i promise,” you rested your forehead against his and close your eyes.

even with your eyes closed, you could fell him smiling. you could feel hope radiating the environment. that was chan, a guy who will never give up once he gets something in his mind. you opened your eyes and felt your heart beating faster as you realized how real this was. chan was really that close to you again.

“you should go.. my parents will come back home any minute and if they see you here they’ll ask me questions and…”

“i know,” he cut you off and spoke in such a gentle tone. he looked at you and caressed your cheek, your foreheads still resting against each others. “can i… can i kiss you? the last time before i take a while to get back to you.”

you chuckled at his request. of course, so typical of him, but who are you to deny his request? the request he made with so much confidence, emphasizing that he certainly will come back to you.

“yeah, you can.”

chans heart exploded right there in the moment he heard the ‘yeah’ coming out of your lips. the grin that was on his face was a grin that no one saw it since that cursed night.

he didnt think twice, closing the distance between your lips as fast as he could. the kiss was more than special, he definitely made sure to pour out all of his love and the feeling of missing you as he lips touched yours.

you wrapped your arms around his neck and he placed his hand on your waist and the other on the back of your neck to tilt your head and be able to kiss you properly. he didnt want this last kiss to be a mediocre one, he wanted to be the kiss, and his mission was accomplished.

once the kiss was broken, he pecked your lips a few more times, making you giggle and his heart melting at the sound. he looked at you with a huge smile on his face, it was like that depressed chan never existed, and reluctantly took a few steps back.

“goodbye, yn. wait for me,” he said as he started to walk away with his back facing the street. “i promise you we will get back together!” he stumbled at a rock that was on the sidewalk and you chuckled. he looked at the rock with a frown on his face before looking at you again, the frown immediately being replaced with a grin. “and keep looking at your finger, cuz one day ill put a ring on it!”

you smiled warmly and signaled him to walk away.

when he was out of your sight, you let out a sigh, a happy one. you had a feeling that everything would work out, that he was going to find a way to make it work. and if he doesnt, at least you knew that he tried hard.

HIGH SCHOOL SWEETHEARTS

yn and chan date since their freshman year and are truly high school sweethearts, but will chan’s dream of becoming an idol get between their relationship?

masterlist — prev — next

taglist: @ivehypnosis @wonkierideul @ateez-atiny380 @noircheols @222brainrot @odxrilove @vixensss @starshuas

56 notes · View notes

gold-rhine · 1 day ago

Text

like its literally insane how beat for beat this lantern rite goes into the same notes as natlan final act, but just does it well. the contrast is crazy-making. SPOILERS 2025 LANTERN RITE i guess

like. oh its a story about pyro girlie who had to lose her family very early and tragically, and then she came under huge amount of dire responsibility, but she didn't let it break her and she stayed positive and bright. she is now confronted with a critical situation where she has to do hard decision and be ready to die to save her country. she says goodbyes to her friends, trying to not let them know she's going to sacrifice herself, but they realise it and do everything to save her. in the end, she realizes her life isn't over, its too early for her to go, has heartfelt reunion with ghosts of her family and is saved by unified efforts of her friends, showing how much she's loved and wanted in the world of the living. (im joking, last part didnt happen to mavuika lol, i'll get to it)

but like you can actually see how liyue kids are ACTUALLY friends and how they like each other, they have palpable chemistry that is shown, instead of just like. flatly declared in natlan. hu tao pestering embarrassed yun jin into performing her silly cringe hilichurl song in operatic style has more character than mavuika had in all acts of natlan and her story quest COMBINED. and hu tao visiting friends to give them goodbye gifts under the guise of holiday tradition with half-jokey heartfelt well wishings is what i think natlan tried to do with ancient name thing, where characters like say why they like traveler. except in lantern rite it works because its personal and meaningful, and in natlan its just flashy anime poses and random cliches. "i love being traveler's friend!", "surely she comes from a good home!" like??? its fucking nothings that coworkers awkwardly say at the birthday party because they don't know you.

and suddenly in liyue they know that characters can have differences and STILL be respectful and well-intended, with hu tao and baizhu exchanging jabs about being archenemies, instead of entire cast being blandly okay yay all the time in natlan. hu tao's conversation with zhongli exploring her mental state before going into danger, bittersweet, but finally honest, just straight up doesnt have a parallel in natlan because they never give mavuika any fucking way to express herself. not to mention that hu tao has more conflict and complicated feelings about her lost family and grief than mavuika ever has with her sister where they talk about fucking nothing and just like politely nod at each other.

and the theme of unity actually works in liyue because it does have all other characters uniting to share hu tao's burden and save her, instead of capitano ex machina just showing up and solo taking her place bc he's here to hijack the narrative and make it about khaenriah instead of natlan. so natlan's theme about unity just never goes anywhere except of characters standing in the circle and yelling "for natlan!!", there is no tangible effort for this unity, nothing they have to overcome together. they just wait for everyone to awaken their ancient names, stand in a circle to power up mavuika, and then she solo finishes everything with carpet bombing. and then she solo beats up abyss boss. and then capitano makes it all about himself. like. much unity.

and even traveler being a descender isn't really used in natlan despite making a big deal out of it, her ability to challenge fate or whatever literally never actually comes up. meanwhile in liyue it is used within established lore reasons - not being connected to irminsul, BUT, very importantly, just being special descender would not be enough to save hu tao, its the fact that they are friends, they share a bond and care about each other, i.e. only by using the plum's branch traveler is able to connect and find hu tao.

#rhine talks

35 notes · View notes

noisyghost · 13 hours ago

Note

GOD I absolutely agree re:werewolf tropes, especially in romance. I want to read so many werewolf books, but So Many play into pack dynamics/violent werewolf bf/etc etc tropes that it feels nigh impossible to find something that will Hit for me specifically. Do you (or anyone who stumbles upon this) have any recs for werewolf media? Particularly that which is outside of romance as the main plot/genre? (Nothing against romance as a whole, I just don't tend to enjoy it when it's the main focus of a story)

god yeah im the exact same, its why i usually end up gravitating more towards horror werewolves cause at least then i dont normally have to worry about weird alpha boyfriend tropes lol. But that means i dont really have too many media recommendations! I'll put a couple thoughts under the read more, but if anyone has any recs, feel free to reply below 🙏

i don't have any book recommendations bc i havent read a real book in years so most of this will be movies/shows/comics

Being Human (US) is really good in a lot of places (one of my absolute favorite werewolf designs), but the last season really falls into a bunch of those werewolf bullshit tropes so i pretend it doesnt exist lol. i think the good bits outweigh the stupid though! I have also watched the UK version and its. not bad. i just didnt really get into it idk.

The Order 1886 barely feels like a werewolf game even though it is for sure a werewolf game lol. i would recommend just watching a playthru tho cause the gameplay is pretty much nothing but the plot and characters are very cool!!!!

Uhhhh everyone knows van helsing which is an objectively just an ok movie but the werewolves and vampires go so hard i have to like it. Dog Soldiers is also a fun campy flick, and i enjoyed werewolves within but thats more of a mystery than a genuine werewolf movie. Annndddd i did actually like the wolf man 2025 like. its gonna piss a lot of werewolf fans off i think and i know why people dont like it but i think the ideas and themes it presents are really interesting to me specifically! so idk if the individual werewolf enjoyer will like it in the same way i did but i will recommend it if u like werewolves that really lean into the disease/virus aspect of it.

Wilde Life is a webcomic that i really enjoy that is.... werewolf adjacent. I wouldnt really call Cliff a werewolf, more of a shapeshifter, but they sometimes call him a werewolf so its close enough for me to mention it and theres lots of other cool critters and scary bits to make the comic worth recommending.

I dont think Prague Race (webcomic) is officially available anymore but that also had some fun werewolves in it. You can probably find an archive of it if you google the name (the artist's new comic, 'tiger, tiger' is also very good but has nothing to do with werewolves lol)

How to be a werewolf is another webcomic that does do a bunch of the pack dynamic trope but the characters are charming and has some romance but it isn't the primary plot, its more about family than anything. and a female werewolf main character is always a plus!

uhhhh im sure theres more im forgetting these are just some of the ones from the top of my head

...

ok literally this is so niche and i probably shouldnt even bother mentioning it but i have sat on this fic for literally 8 years now and it makes me so sad the author never finished it but. one of the only werewolf fanfics ive ever read that i really clicked with was an overwatch hanzo/cassidy fic called 'spurs don't pair with scare chords' and i need to put it here bc its the platonic ideal of a werewolf fic with a well paced romance that isn't the major intrigue point. its my white whale of a fanfic and it being unfinished haunts me. i wish overwatch was good

#shut up bug #not art #also not to like. shill. but uhhhh. i also write werewolf shit lol #surely 2025 will be the year i find the time to start drafting. surely.

39 notes · View notes

rencatuive · 2 days ago

Text

i thought itd be fun to document my reactions to the prologue on notes so this is just a copypaste of that. dont expect anything detailed at all mostly just 'ooh this character is cute' and. itll be that for all of them cause i dont dislike any characters at all:

[Student X]

airi feels extremely traumatised already

god bless student 4 is so real

ah shit student 6 intro is so cool with the student 1 connections

student 9 has good vibes i like em

STUDENT 11 <3 [manami]

i feel like student 12 is the type of character to have an *interesting* fanbase /neu

TAMBA THATS THE ONE I LIKED shes sweet omg

[Interviews]

isono is so cute i love the butterfly vibes. also i like the more mysterious vibe change near the end, its intruiging! i see her as the type to put on a strong/overly positive façade but i guess thats a pretty surface level observation

uh oh i think im just gonna call all these characters cute. harada is very cute. i love animal likers. not much more to say

(sidenote, it kinda sucks being willingly spoiled on a media youre not into. and then you decide to get into it, and you recognise these things you know play a part in the story. totally my fault lol)

chiba has the biggest 'probably have gone through the Horrors' energy to me just cause like. child star. she really intrigues me personality wise though. (oh maybe she is 17 ?? theres a lot of mystery here already which i like - she has a doctor too) fun!

ooh i was looking at designs and i liked kamimura too a lot. (side note is the interviewer straight up The Mastermind that would be neat i think) I like his voice a lot btw!! i like the energy

hayashi is so cool omg thats it . genuinely its nice to someone actually this defiant like Yeah fuck em up

oh wada is the guy whos i guess a fan of isono! probably too much of a fan! wonder about their interactions for sure... hes actually really cute. also this interviews getting deep.

sasaki is so cutr omg my type is glasses. the studious archetype is really cool and... dies early a lot of the time?? so uh good luck !!

aww childrens book illustrator <3 i really like ojima he seems nice!!

oh yeah okazaki had a cool asf design. ive. heard like One spoilery comment about her but its okay no i didnt. i really likw the intonation of 'im an open book'. (also i like how most of this cast have "no phobias" which i guess could be true?? but yeah no im not spilling that either) i like her vibes a lot rn though :D

demonologist?????? okay dude. this guy is interesting! /pos

oh oh im gonna like tsuno a Lot. and could i assume a lot more than other people? just based off how energetic she is. she has a lil fang :D hope shes not dead

i really like the vocal perforamance in hiroakis one btw. oh wait dude people ship hirojima. thats The ship in this fandom right. i love his energy btw. he dgaf (until the character development hits) also i assume youre not meant to see that little strip of glasses shading as eyes but i totally do and it makes him 100x goofier i love it

Tamba is the character I put as my favourite pre-reaction so i remember her [Student X]. loving the contrast of attitudes between them(understandably) and i do actually like her a lot here!!!! tamba nation!!!!

theres a few shyboys in this cast and i think at least one of them has to be evil or generally has a personality change or something. right? But right now theyre all cuties <3 including hasagawa

firedancer is a cool talent. lotta cool talents in this one actually. she also has fangs yippee!! watari having an unconventional talent seems to be bringing her a lot of stress though, makes sense. love the vibes

fancy boy. i thought he and tamba could be related or something at first bc. omg light blonde hair!!!! if a character mentions another cjaracter in this ill assume theyre a ship. uhhhh sasanagi

okay so right now im a big Tsuno enjoyer shes a real cutie. still liking tamba a lot!! okazaki is my favourite design. as for the boys i like harada and hiroaki for totally different reasons. and i think i want to learn the most about chiba right now :D

the voice acting in this is great btw and im really looking forward to the rest!!

#tetro danganronpa pink #tdrp

29 notes · View notes

ecto-hazard · 2 days ago

Text

Well Boys. We did it. I posted this on October 1st, 2024, and just two months later, December 20th, we officially got the end of the TF2 comic series after a 7 year hiatus. I'm fully taking the responsibility on this one. Clearly my passioned rant about this game's storyline and my desire for more of this enchanting tale singlehandedly inspired Valve to finish their masterpiece. im sure it had nothing to do with a negligent company finally bending to years of protest of an unplayable game and setting an unreasonable deadline on the writers and artists to crank out a half baked finale to earn some goodwill from the mob

all that aside, i really do like the ending of the tf2 comic. im not going to claim it was a masterpiece and that everyone who has criticism of it is wrong because it does seem rushed and a lot of characters dont get a lot of closure or even thematically appropriate lack of closure. even beyond the mercs, stuff like the charles darling plot goes nowhere and saxton getting his company back is a big nothingburger. and it wouldve been nice to get a proper epilogue where we see at least a little more of what the other mercs are up to after the war.

but its clear that a lot of what was put into the finale, although it might not be sewn together the best, was intentional from the beginning and by themselves are well done story elements, and emails with the creators confirmed as much. the administrator's lore is chilling and im glad they took the time to close it off, even if it resulted in sacrificing other scenes. Between that, the meaningful Scout and Spy interaction at the end, and the very conclusion with Saxton and Maggie, there's really impactful planned scenes throughout this comic. It's okay to be disappointed that there wasn't more to tie it together, but I think what we got was good.

With that said, they didnt fucking write anything else with the other blu guys so im mad about it. Lightheartedly anyway. Take all of this as lighthearted.

But that's not to say that there isn't insight into blu team and team fortress as an operation as a whole from this comic. Not only is blu engineer here again, but we also get a glimpse of TF headquarters and what the whole operation actually looked like. Its interesting that I havent seen a lot of people talk about this at length, but i cant blame people for getting caught up in all the canon children and name reveals because that's probably more fun. But there is something ostensibly wrong with me so we're going to dive back in, see what we can squeeze from the already juiced fibers of this comic about blu team, and cover a few points i mightve missed in my first post. you're already reading this far you're probably not turning around. lets go down this shitty rabbit hole together

now ill go ahead and disclaim that ch 7 doesnt really have any explicit evidence to clone theory but just. just stick with me. trust me. just. j

Blu Engineer

Dell conagher is back babey. He really doesn't do a whole lot but he's the Main Blu guy right. The officially blu character! Dell Conagher is Blu! and he's got the same characterization and everything!!! yippee!!!!

We can see based on his greeting and Pyro's positive reaction that not only is the team familiar with Blu Engie, they're on good terms with him. This is most likely indicative that Blu Engie bonded with the red team during the events of MVM. What's also interesting is, compared to the rest of Team Fortress, he's got an actual role at TF industries. It seems like for everyone else, this is their first time here, based on their reactions to the environment, but we'll get into that later. It's been established that Blu engie has a family history with the company, and that's what's got him in such a high position. I think it also might suggest that, if clone theory is real, this engineer is an Original. We never see Red engie doing something like this right. It's always explicitly the Blu one.

What's interesting is this Engineer is more reserved. More cautious. In game lines suggest he's got a god complex and is as insane as the others. He canonically sawed his own hand off for a cool robot hand for chrissake. This is obviously due to working closely with the administrator for as long as he has and seeing the futility of it all. I wouldn't consider it a character inconsistency. But it is interesting to compare the character directly across the series and see how he's worn down.

This is especially apparent after the Administrator dies. The old engineer seems like he wouldve jumped at the chance to use that australium. But he's seen just how much someone can let it corrupt their life. He doesn't want anything to do with it. And that's really interesting.

A small detail that also aligns with this change in mindset is Engineer having two flesh hands again in this series. We don't really know if its actually a flesh hand or he got some sort of more realistic prosthetic, but it at the very least functions like a flesh hand. Originally this seemed like a weird detail, but in the context, it shows how he's abandoned that more megalomanic side of himself. I wonder what drove him to that. Did he realize over time that the hand caused him pain? Did he have trouble using it in normal tasks? Did he find he couldn't strum the guitar the same? He couldn't feel the warmth of someone else's hand? Did he see the administrator becoming a shadow of herself, tormenting herself with technology to stay alive just a bit longer, and feel guilt? Did he feel like an enabler? A hypocrite? Would having a flesh hand again maybe set some sort of example?

None of that really has anything to do with the theory probably, but its cool to see that much depth put into a Blu for once.

The Alphabet Soup Squad

On the same panel with the blu engie reunion, we see this thing

five alphabetical letters with five statues associated with them, and a notable missing sixth letter that would presumably be F. these guys have been referenced by name before by Blu Cheavy in the previous issue.

Ajax, Citadel, and Echelon match the A,C and E respectively. These are the other teams under the administrator's employment. Interestingly, this panel was changed after ch7 came out. he originally called Ajax "team vanguard," but this was probably changed for continuity. it makes me wonder if there was an intent to delve a little deeper into what these teams were, but they didnt get to it.

The fact that Team Fortress isnt the Only team working for the administrator is a detail that's been tossed around quite a few times in the comic before the final chapter, and i dont think anyone really read into it much before. they're mentioned several other times in the series, though not by name. nobody really processed it till we were given a proper visual i guess

The last panel in particular i had previously chocked up to meaning "which team? red or blu?" but what it actually means is "which of the 5 main teams- oh none of them"

team fortress, compared to the rest of the mercenary world, are the rejects, and they explicitly say this. but i dont think we really knew what that really meant in perspective. and i dont think they knew either.

demo's never seen this image. he's never seen this merc. we dont need him to say that to see that. He's never seen Real mercenaries. he couldn't imagine being on this level. admired. lowkey worshipped in this facility. and the dialogue around this scene captures it as well. this is a realization for everyone. they aren't the "real" mercs. and that doesnt even necessarily mean clones. theyre outcasts. they arent up to standard. they dont receive the support and glory of the real mercs because theyre not the 'good' teams.

this has been pointed out before (and i think correctly) to be a commentary on tf2 as a franchise. i think its fair to say valve didnt expect it to hold out this long. for it to be as beloved nearly 20 years after its release. but it is. tf2 is the reject game. the game without support. the game without the glory. its not supposed to be valve's 'good' game. and yet its still here.

grey what the fuck does any of this have to do with clone theory. uH.

so as i said, nothing in this issue really explicitly functions as evidence for clone theory. i think considering how team fortress is considered the reject team, its plausible to extrapolate that they might be reject clones for the 'real' mercs (who are all dead now i guess???) but that's not so much theorizing as just grasping at straws here. I think clone theory makes sense in that it might be a cheap way to keep the war waging, but in the grand scheme of the story, it would be overall less important to determine if red or blu is made up of clones, and more important to see how team fortress as a whole is considered bottom of the barrel shit being recycled just to keep money flowing. and it seems like they werent always that way. the evidence of the F pedestal indicates that they were once considered a great team. but that's really all i can glean from this issue unfortunately.

its kind of a bummer that blu wasnt explored in the series any more that it was, But yknow what, at the end of the day we got the cutes christmas image with the whole team and the heavymedic undertones and the-

wait a second.

no.

no. they wouldnt do this... they wouldnt do this to me... no...

ENGIE IS MOTHER FUCKING

RED

YOU GOTTA BE KIDDING WITH ME VALVE. YOU GOTTA BE KIDDING WITH ME. THIS IS THE SECOND TIME THEYVE AUTOBALANCED SOMEONE TO RED ON US. THEYRE DOING THIS TO FUCK WITH ME SPECIFICALLY ARENT THEY!!! THEYRE ONTO ME. THEY KNOW IM TOO CLOSE TO THE TRUTH! WHATEVER THE FUCK THE TRUTH IS I DONT EVEN KNOW WHATS THE POINT OF THIS. EVERYONE'S LIKE RETIRED FROM RED I GUESS BUT THEY STILL MADE A POINT OF PUTTING THEM ALL IN RED TONES SO WHY THE F U C K IS THE ONLY EXPLICITLY COHESIVELY BLU CHARACTER IN THIS ENTIRE FUCKING FRANCHISE RED NOW. THIS IS CLEARLY ORIGINALLY A BLU GUY WHYS HE RED NOW WHY WHY W H Y

Intermission

Did you know we have even more evidence that Red soldier and blu soldier are the same guy????? well we do fucker!!!!!

previously on dragonballz, we pointed out that both red and blu soldier are referred to as Doe and work as a lawyer, but technically I think red soldier is only ever referred to as "Doe," not "Jane Doe." he could have a different fuckign first name and be in like a stan twins situation with the blu soldier, which would be funny. but we do actually have confirmation his name is Jane. Behold, the decoy map.

This is an mvm map that's supposed to be a fake mann co facility to trick the robots into attacking the wrong place (and it works!) on the map, theres a contract pasted to a wall that authorizes Jane Doe to build the place

This base is mentioned in the comic, and it shows a familiar image. yep thats jane motherfucking doe, winner of the nose picking contest and verified lawyer. Granted this was after the red/blu truce but my sanity is barely holding on here so just go with it okay

Team Fortress Two (but actually)

So what was team fortress like when it was good. The team fortress in team fortress 2 is actually team fortress 3. they're the third generation of mercs. the previous team was the team fortress classic.

notice how they're a mix of red and blu in this image. this and the fact that team fortress classic is a game you can play implicates that there's a red and blu classic team in the lore as well. the blu classic team features as antagonists in the comic series. them being blu was probably sort of arbitrary. probably to contrast with the main mercs being red and to make it clear these are the bad guys the baddies theyre evilllll

this wasnt just when team fortress was a 'good' team. they very well mightve been the best team. blu cheavy says they were able to take down all the other teams on their own, which is fucking crazy. and cheavy identifies the new team as rejects as well, so team fortress becoming the reject team would likely be when the classic generation switched out.

another detail is their medic is just dead i guess? or at least he's not in the picture when the comic series takes place. hes commonly theorized to be dead. whatever the case, that's what gave the tf2 medic the chance to work with them. i wonder if the implication might be that the death of the classic medic is what caused the classic team's fallout. if that was the turning point between team fortress and team rejects. you're gonna have a rough time in game if you dont have a medic on your team, thats for sure.

the fact that there's a mix of the team here and then theyre all blu in the comic series may also imply that there were duplicates on either team? but it could also be an mvm teams merged situation. its hard to say. whatever the case, they died permanently, so either wasn't a thing or is no longer a thing. and the same is true for everyone else since the administrator is dead.

anyway like. there isnt a conclusion i really am coming to with this post i guess. it became less about clone theory and more about just rambling about the universe. theres a lot of interesting stuff there. and i wish it was explored more. it seems like it shouldve been explored more. im all good with show dont tell but we were shown slivers of a picture with the new issue and its a shame. i moreso wish they actually did the goddamn adult swim show just cause they actually included blu team in their promos so like there was something there

i still think clone theory fits into the universe they have set up, but we're probably never going to get any closure on blu team and that's fine. as i said before, the fan content we get is enough for me for now. but i love saying things for a long time and subjecting everyone else to it so uh. blu team's number one stan will stick around out here till the end

The End (aw shit)

ive never had an original thought process and i will continue not to, aka, Grey's TF2 BLU team clone theory post. This is a long one boys.

i was talking about this with some people yesterday but i really wish tf2 canonically acknowledged blu team more and i think everyone who likes tf2 agrees with me. In case you're one of my hfjone followers who are unaware of tf2's story, Ill just give you the basic overview cause the story is like scrambled around in a bunch of comics, videos, and updates so it might be kind of overwhelming but i do recommend trying.

THE BACKGROUND INFORMATION

There's like these two richass brothers fighting over ownership of a plot of land inherited from their father who gave it to both of them in hopes theyd learn to cooperate with each other. Like reasonable people, they decided to hold an all out war in the American southwest by hiring the world's most skilled mercenaries to fight their battles for them in hopes one of them would claim the land. They each own their own company, RED or BLU, and in the game you fight on one of these two teams usually with the objective of taking territory or intel. A key plot point, that neither the mercenaries or the two brothers are aware of, is that this whole war is being orchestrated to be in a perpetual stalemate by a woman known as the Administrator, so she's the one involved with managing the mercenaries and coordinating attacks so that nobody makes any substantial victories. The gist makes this sound like a more serious story than it is like theyre fighting over a plot of gravel its really dumb actually. And then there's robots and shit that happens later just dont worry about it for now. dont even worry about it

In the game you can play as one of 9 classes of mercenaries, shown above with the aforementioned brothers and also saxton hale (dont worry about him either). Youll notice that in this image its a mix of red and blu people, but these guys exist on both teams. When it comes to promotional material, you almost see them as red team, but the exact same classes exist on blu. And they look the same, and sound the same, and have the same weapons and stats.

Obviously from a gameplay standpoint, it makes sense for these guys to be identical, but they aren't just identical in the game. There's a ton of stuff in videos and comics where they just use the same designs or models, same voices, same personality, everything.

So that's where the popular Clone Theory comes from. Basically one or both of these teams are clones of the original mercenaries to keep the fight between teams fair, because as stated before, these guys are in an orchestrated stalemate.

Again, if youre unfamiliar with tf2, you may be wondering what these guys canon reactions are to the fact that they are fighting somebody who looks and acts exactly like them right? Like, there's a ton of comics and videos about them, so they probably noticed or something? well they FUCKING DONT. ITS NEVER BROUGHT UP.

MY FRUSTRATION WITH THE LACK OF BLUUUUU

i really want them to like. fucking acknowledge what the hell is going on there? like are they actually clones in canon? it would make sense but its never fucking talked about. like even if they didnt actually give a definitive answer, i wish at the very least they pointed out the fact that HEY. these guys we're paid to kill look just like us thats fuckign weird. granted like most of the team are idiots, but while someone like soldier might not question what's going on, i'd think someone like Sniper or Spy who's jobs involve keeping a close eye on the enemy team would probably notice right?????

to be fair also theyve like. never interacted with themselves in any media stuff? the closest we ever get to seeing a red and blu counterpart interact outside the actual game is in meet the spy but we'll get to that later. It's interesting that they either purposefully avoided having them interact or they just overlooked a chance for the funny. we never see what its like for the mercs when they originally get hired (maybe cause they were never hired at all!!!!!!!!!! THEYRE ALL CLOENSSSAAGHG) so we dont really get to gauge their reactions

well why focus on blu team? pretty much all the media is very red centric. the meet the team videos are all about their respective red members, and the proper comic series is about red team (or is it?). the only meaningful stuff we see from blu team is from the war update, meet the spy, and that one christmas comic where spy told a child to murder someone. why's it so red centric, you may ask? well its cause they look better in the promotional art dumbass. do you think people would buy the orange box with blue people on the cover? fuck no think about the color theory

of course its entirely plausible that the red and blu team only use the same character designs for simplicity sake. its possible in universe they are two different sets of people who just look the same to us for the sake of gameplay, but that seems a bit outside the style of storytelling, where everything is sort of ridiculous and literal. i feel like in writing they would commit to it, but they've just managed to write these guys so they never have to interact and acknowledge how weird it is

so i wanna explore what of blu team is actually acknowledged and see if we can reach some sort of conclusion about them? cause clone theory seems to be the most prevalent but what do we actually know that would support that? But before we can even get into that we have to talk about the unavoidable elephant in the room

IS RESPAWN EVEN FUCKING REAL??????

In tf2 you dont stay dead when you die unless youre playing like a specific gamemode that nobody plays. you respawn after a short period of time in a little room and then go back out to get killed again. this is like crazy magic shit so that probably wouldnt be canon right. except crazy magic shit is canon, but that doesnt mean people are getting brought back from the dead- no thats canon too. While nothing in the videos and comics explicitly states that the mercenaries that are getting killed are able to just pop back to life, its not out of the realm of (tf2) reality. Furthermore, certain voicelines that activate after killing the same person multiple times in the game indicate that the characters themselves are in fact killing the same people over and over again, and they do just come back to life. The reason this is even relevant is just cause like BLU team has all canonically died at least once, and the BLU Spy has died two different times at least, so if they can respawn it would make more sense

Since we're talking about voicelines, what do the voicelines tell us about BLU team? really not a lot. The voicelines are the same no matter which team youre on, which supports them being the same people, but again is probably a game mechanic thing. Now onto the videos.

We can sort of skim over most of the meet the team videos because Blu's central role in almost all of them is getting killed, but there's a couple meaningful interactions in some of them.

Meet the Soldier

There isn't a whole lot going on in this one, but I find it interesting that they made the choice to include the BLU soldier's head here, but mostly obscured. This could be an example of an instance where they purposefully chose to avoid showing these two guys at the same time, which couldve been easily avoided by not putting it there at all honestly. Also why does he have that many blu helmets

Meet the Spy

This is the most we ever see of blu team in the videos. Characterization is mainly featured with Blu Spy, Soldier, and Heavy. These characters share the same mannerisms and personality of their Red counterparts here for sure. Most interestingly, Spy also talks a lot about his Red counterpart here. It's pretty clear he seems to consider the two to be similar in terms of skill and threat, which would make sense if he suspected the Red Spy was one and the same.

The Scout here isnt the actual BLU Scout, so his behavior is a bit suspect. It'd make sense that Red Spy is behaving like the Blu Scout and that their behavior isnt actually meaningfully different from the Red Scout. Furthermore, he's the one who specifically draws the comparison between himself and the Blu Spy ("I've killed dozens of spies... like you!"). So it seems the feeling is mutual.

This video is interesting also cause it implicates that Red Spy is Blu Scout's father, while the comics implicates that he's the Red Scout's father. Like what is it? Is he both of their dads? Is Blu Spy anyone's dad? Do the scouts have separate moms? Are the moms also clones? if both scouts went to see their mom and would they end up meeting at the same place and freak out? See this is all interesting which is why i WISH THEY WOULD AT LEAST ACKNOWLEDGE THAT ITS STRA

Meet the Medic

Blu isn't really characterized here a whole lot. A minor joke that's in here is Blu Spy's head, which is a reference to the unused concept for mtm if you weren't aware. But that's just like a one second joke and we don't ever see him again except for that one taunt. Honestly i really shouldve just skipped talking about th WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT

That is about 5 million BLU Soldiers. This is i think the ONLY time we've ever seen multiples of a single class on the same team in tf2's story universe. This is perhaps the most damning evidence for the clone theory we're going to get.

However, this is pretty easy to write off as a production streamlining choice. They want to make a mountain of bodies to stand on, so it's probably easier to copy and paste the same model than take the time to get a good mix of classes in there, and I can respect not wanting to waste that much effort on a minor detail of what was probably their highest quality production at the time. They did take the time to give them different hats though, but that's not hard to do in sfm. But if this scene is literal I really wanna know what the fuck happened here. At least we know where all those helmets came from

War Update Comic

Speaking of BLU Soldier, this comic is all about him. We learn a lot about him in this comic, such as his name being Jane Doe, a trait he seems to share with the RED soldier

(though this panel comes from the mann co no more series and its possible that, at this point in the story, this IS the blu soldier for. reasons. we'll get to that)

He behaves in the irrational violent manner we're accustomed to for the red soldier, though there is an interesting detail that he lives alone in an apartment, as its later revealed that red soldier is roommates with a wizard (dont worry about it). in game voicelines being the same for both classes means that both red and blu soldiers claim to be his roommate but voicelines being the same doesnt really mean a whole lot

Loose Cannon

This is around the time TF2 decided to have lore. We learn that BLU engineer is contracted to keep the two Mann brothers alive so the war can go on perpetually, as his family have a history of doing this apparently. The fact that BLU Engineer is the one who's got this specialized role is actually something thats consistent later in the comic as he specifically is revealed to be personally aiding the administrator

As for Red similarities, well. Blu Engie here is referred to as Dell Conagher, and I don't know think the red engie ever is. However, they both have a cool robot arm known as the Gunslinger, an item that specifically the Blu engie got access to in this comic, not the red one.

either the red engineer has some sort of shared memory with blu, or he was given access to these files after the blu engineer built his own gunslinger so things could stay in a stalemate. there's more evidence for the former, but i would believe the latter too.

Meet the Director

The origin behind the meet the team videos is revealed to be "interviews" staged to keep an eye on the red team and also make a point of how stupid it was for them to agree to an interview in the first place. Blu is basically absent from these comics, but they are mentioned. They made the explicit choice to skip videos of them for whatever reason, hence why all the meet the team videos are red team focused. I dont know how much weight this comic holds though cause its just announcing the saxxys. rip.

A Smissmas Story

This Christmas special is the most blu the comics ever get. It's also pretty standalone though. So while the characters are all pretty in line with their red counterparts as far as personality, not much extends outside of this to really point any fingers. The main tie in to the main series is this courtroom scene where Soldier is acting as Scout's lawyer.

This, as it turns out, gets referenced far later in the main series where the Red Soldier wants to act as Red Scout's lawyer in a courtroom.

Well. okay. case closed then? These two different red guys remember this exact scene that occured with the blu guys as if it happened to them. Theyve got some weird shared experience thing going on right. Guess theyre clones???

YOU FOOL WE HAVENT EVEN TALKED ABOUT MANN VS MACHINE

You remember those two brothers who are the whole conflict thing well they fucking Died. Turns out they had a secret eviler brother who killed them. "Oh what's his name grey?" uh. dont worry about it.

This event causes both the red team and blu team to have to work together in a new coop mode where they fight new brother's army of robots so he cant take over mann co, which is what the administrator and saxton hale (still dont worry about him) oversees.

(this video is so badass man)

So red team and blu team are mixed together now. That's fine though they're still color coded. ARE THEY????? ARE THEY??????

in mvm, all players wear red, and all evil robots are blue. It seems like they had plans to let people play as blu team against red robots cause red robot models exist but they didnt implement it.

This is consistent in the comics as well, where we in The Shadow Boxer see all Ms Pauling is planning only with the red team to fight the robot uprising.

See all red wait-

ive seen this image before. what the hell. lemme check back at the main page

WHAT THE FUCK WHYS THE HEAVY BLU IN THE THUMBNAIL

DID THEY. DID THEY ORIGINALLY MAKE THE COMIC WITH A MIX OF RED AND BLU AND THEN GO BACK AND MAKE THEM ALL RED? LIKE THE HEAVY WAS BLU IN THE ORIGINAL MVM UPDATE AS WELL, SO IT MAKES SENSE HE WAS BLU. IS HE. IS HE JUST WEARING A RED SHIRT NOW????

so whats this mean? it means that in the main story series, the red team we follow MIGHT NOT EVEN BE THE FUCKING ORIGINAL RED TEAM. they couldve all just put on red shirts to distinguish themselves better from the robots or something. there's just no way to be certain who's who anymore

well damnit grey guess thats theory over then BITCH YOU THOUGHT

GRAVE MATTERS

Grave matters is a comic released after the shadow boxers for that years halloween update. Despite this, it explicitly takes place after the two brothers are killed

These two guys become ghosts disputing who actually died first because all they can do is bicker. So they turn to a lawyer to actually figure things out. What lawyer you ask?

JANE MOTHERFUCKING DOE

they go to RED TEAMS SOLDIER, who is named Doe, who also claims to be a lawyer. this is EXPLICITLY before the teams can be mixed up, so this is the ACTUAL RED SOLDIER REMEMBERING SOMETHING THE BLU SOLDIER DID. I DID IT. I PROVED CLONE THEORY. ITS REAL. AHAHAHLDKGHDKLASHLGHKSLGGJ

well. honestly no i didnt. its highly likely clone theory is real if you take all this evidence as legitimate, but tf2 is kind of a bullshit game when it comes to how seriously it takes itself. there's contradictions about demo's upbringing, about whether or not medic actually had a license, shit like that. so its all suspect and thats okay. i dont blame them for not having a concrete plan for the story of a silly shooter game.

theres been good news for tf2 lately but i somehow doubt they're ever going to bring attention to this one specific thing i find interesting, and thats okay. there's plenty of fan made media that explores the blu team. Emesis Blue and Lil Pootis are amazing animations about them. You've also got fanfiction like Kith and Kin and You Need to Get a Head that specifically explore the angle of the tf2 teams being clones. And I think that's what makes tf2 special is the community that gets creative with it. Yeah it may be cool for valve to come out some day with the 7th chapter and the heavy update and the adult swim series, i know id be ecstatic. But we've got tons of people who can create all on their own and thats enough for me I think.

53 notes · View notes

kissingarthurclaus · 1 year ago

Text

If you have an f/o that loses many people close to them, imagine them allowing themselves to grieve in front of you. To be held in your arms as their shoulders shake with the force or their crying because they need to let it out or it'll consume them from the inside out. They can be vulnerable with you, they can fall apart with you, knowing you'll help them pick the pieces back up.

#jane journals #self insert talk #💙 oh captain my captain 💙#this is about rex ; w ;#my partner and best friend and i watched a particularly intense arc of the clone wars last night #it was funnnnn love when star wars hurts me!!#but goddd it goes without saying that rex loses people he cares for every single day #its what they were 'meant' to do. they were made to be expendable #but he knew and cared for every single man in his troop and thats gotta weigh on him over time #idk while the Really Sad part was happening in the ep i couldnt help but think how brea would comfort him #would hold him close and tight and keep him grounded #and ofc she grieves with him.#ougghhhh this reminds me of an old fic i was working on FOREVER ago 🤔🤔#i didnt have an ending for it but...now im thinking

96 notes · View notes

itseghost · 11 months ago

Text

i have been steadily catching up with the mighty nein campaign the past few weeks after i fell off right around travelercon arc a few years ago.... i am ENTRANCED AGAIN and i have been doodling them while i put off thesis film work..

#jester lavorre #caduceus clay #lucien tavelle #mollymauk tealeaf #critical role #critical role fanart #critrole #the mighty nein #cr m9 #cr campaign 2 #m9 #technically this is just lucien. because i didnt wanna paint the rest of his tattoos i fear. but im tagging molly anyways dont kill me #but he has the horn jewelry? i didnt think this through #and no i have no idea where his eye tattoos actually are #im on episode 136 right now. utterly captivated by whatever essek and caleb have going on #deeply stressed about the incoming end of the campaign though #what like 2 years late. LMAO #itseart

669 notes · View notes

courfee · 10 months ago

Text

“Regulus would be proud of us,” James whispered quietly to no one in particular, still gripping onto the painting like a life raft.

— Tender Curiosities, Baby! @otrtbs

#tender curiosities baby #art heist baby #james potter fanart #james potter #jegulus #rosekiller #rosekiller fanart #marauders #marauders fanart #evan rosier #barty crouch jr #jegulus fanart #jegulus fanfiction #fic: ahb #art heist baby!#mine #my art #hp #ahb #ive thought about this scene for so long it just took me forever to draw cause once again the anatomy of cars is the bane of my existence #like originally i wanted evan and barty holding hands to be visible to have the contrast of sad lonely james and sad not lonely rosekiller #but alas cars wont allow it #ahb just still has my entire heart you dont get it #i have a none blurry rosekiller and a just james in front of blue with stars version of this but i think ill only put them on insta...#(sneaky end notes: i do have to admit i am not too pleased with evan and barty but this was my first time drawing them)#(so i couldnt figure it out quite yet hency why they look a little. less efforty...)#(also the snake ring is the same design that i drew for chapter 34 of ahb in my little chapter illustrations for my typeset)#((nvm i just checked back and i am fully lying here i used a different one for my typeset and now im vaguely upset oops)#(i shouldnt make decisions only half awake im going to think about this for too long now i am sad))#((like suddenly i was like. hold up. i had a different design there didnt i... it was an open ring goddamnit))

714 notes · View notes

stealingpotatoes · 1 year ago

Text

hands you all this cal to announce i’ve FINALLY finished fallen order (by which i mean i finally picked it up again after those couple hours i played a few months ago and then finished the whole game in 2 days lol)

#cal kestis #bd 1 #jedi fallen order #jfo #star wars #my doods #anyway HOLY CRAP YOU MEAN STAR WARS WAS ALLOWED TO BE GOOD BEFORE ANDOR (2022-)??????????????? AND I DIDNT KNOW??#i love cal i loved the story i love how cinematic and amazing it looked good lord #i don't think i've ever played a game which gets such an amazing sense of scale across #like all the great temples or fallen starships were just Wow #like bracca ALONE gobsmacked me. seeing all these things i grew up watching in tcw as wreckage was like Ough Wow and THEY FELT SO HUGE #im just. wow!!#and THAT FINAL MISSION HUH. MOST FEAR INSPIRING VIDEOGAME ENCOUNTER EVER #my only criticisms are the awkward navigation/ level design in some areas and maybe the ending felt a bit lackluster somehow #i say somehow bc i dont get how lol #the reason im making this post past midnight is bc i got off work at 10pm and then immediately had to finish it LOL #anyway big heart emojis im very happy i sat down and actually played it finally #i want jedi survivor now LOL unfortunately it costs money and i have a rule i never buy games in release year lol #tbh i never rlly buy games til they're £20 or less

2K notes · View notes

valgeristik · 4 months ago

Text

Ничего не останется от нас, Нам останемся, в лучшем случае, мы

hi. hello. listen to this song

i have so many thoughts about these two. oh my god. maybe i will write it out some day, but for now drawing it out will do

translation will be under the cut! knowing the words does add to the work so i do recommend reading it. or just enjoy the art <3

Vetted Gaza Evacuation Fundraiser List

E-sims donation

heres the translation, color coded according to how i broke it up for the art. just in casies

first page:

Love is scarier than war

Love strikes more true than steel

second page:

More true, because of your own volition

third page:

You run towards all the winds

Let there be pain and eternal battle

Not atmospheric, not earthly

fourth page:

But definitely with you

caption:

There will be nothing left of us,

we will be left with, in the best case, ourselves

#kunst huli #legend of zelda #botw link #botw zelda #botw zelink #tloz #zelink #totk #botw #i cannot express how proud i am that i actually managed not only to finish this #BUT. to have it look GOOD #painting stuff n making it messy in an appealing way has always been a fucking STRUGGLE for me #n i do think u can see my over-rendering tendencies rear their head up on the last one #and also i guess i should have made the last two pages connect like i did with the rest of them but i think it still works. thematically #the last one is like. the end. a break. the start of a much needed retirement #a breather u might say!#i also think the devs should have let link hug her at the end #he deserves it he thought hed never see her like this again #oh alsooooo since im on a tangent anyway #like many people i was disappointed by the cop-out of just giving link his arm back at the end of totk #and i still think it would be cool if he didnt #(or if he kept the magic hand. just imagine how thatll help with all the restoration work dlkfgjdfkgjdfkg)#BUT anyway. i thought about it. n i have a theory about what tf did they do at the end to get not only zelda but his arm back #the fucking time powers!!! what if they just reversed time on them...........#much to thunk about. anyway #hope u enjoy <3 #now i can go finish phantom hourglass #god i hate having to go back to the temple of the ocean king tho. its like dishonored but u cant go up OR knock those guys out

163 notes · View notes

aayakashii · 2 months ago

Text

"Go inside. Immediately." Romeo lightly pushed you inside his obscenely wide bathroom and pointed at the tall wooden stool propped in front of his bathroom counter.

"You really don't have to do this..." you dragged your feet slowly and stood awkwardly beside the seating, staring at yourself in the mirror.

You had a full face of makeup, carefully and masterfully applied by Romeo himself after he required your presence in Sinostra for a special night. Some rich student decided to celebrate their birthday at the casino, and Romeo would be damned not to take that chance to drain their pockets for all they were worth.

What was your role in it? Romeo wasn't really sure. But he did make sure, however, that you were there and impeccably attired.

And he did a great job, if he must say so himself. Especially with your eyes. They looked striking and sharp, and he watched all night, with smugness and a bit of a weird discomfort he couldn't quite understand, how so many students seemed to willingly trap themselves inside your gaze. If Romeo could have gotten a nickel for every student who complimented your eyes, he was pretty sure he could have made some solid cash.

Alas, he didn't, so he could only listen as stupid boy after stupid girl after stupid boy after stupid girl came and went, complimenting his very own work of art. The makeup. Obviously. Makeup is artistry, after all. You just happened to be a convenient, compliant canvas (that he kept close to himself all night).

Or so he kept saying to himself.

"Quiet." He hissed, closing the door to the bathroom and making his way towards you and his counter. He unceremoniously grabbed your shoulders and turned you around, with your back now facing the mirror.

"If I don't do this, you'll definitely do a terrible job removing your makeup, then you'll get acne because of those clogged pores, and THEN you'll be even more of an eyesore for me. In the end, I'm doing this for MY sake. Sit down and shut up." He rambled on, satisfied enough with his excuse, as he thoroughly washed his hands.

"Sure..." you said, rolling your eyes, disbelief making itself clear on your voice as you sat on the wooden stoll.

"Do you have any allergies?" He rummaged through the drawers of his counter, carefully selecting a whole collection of products and placing them right next to you. Romeo flipped his hair as he admired himself in the mirror for a second.

"No, siree." You answered, feet dangling as you read the flashy labels of the products.

"Good." He huffed. "Lean back on the counter and close your eyes. Don't open them, otherwise you're gonna get itchy eyes and I don't wanna hear you whine."

"Ooookay." You muttered and leaned back, doing as he said. You knew there wasn't much reason for you to discuss with him when he had his mind set on doing something his way, so you just chose to accept your fate.

Romeo opened a bottle of ridiculously expensive micellar water and poured it on a makeup wipe, shuffling closer to you as he leaned down to apply it on your face.

As much as he tried not to focus on your face as he slowly dragged the cotton pad on your skin, Romeo couldn't help but observe all of your minute details.

He couldn't help but notice how your pores were a bit bigger on your cheeks and how you had the thinnest, almost imperceptible, crease lines between your eyebrows. Probably from furrowing them on the daily, and knew he probably contributed to the etching of those lines on you. He thought of maybe getting you your own jade roller but dismissed the idea with a shake of his head – why would he willingly spend his own money on someone else? That would never be his brand.

He noticed the acne scars on your cheeks and your forehead and scowled. Not at the markings per se, but at how his mind immediately raced to imagine how you looked during your teenage years. You were probably a mess, even more unkempt and disastrous than you were as an adult – a pitiful ugly duckling; something completely unrelatable to Romeo, who had perfect porcelain skin his whole life (a courtesy of being born with a golden spoon in his hands).

And yet, it still frustrated him how he would never be privy to the life you had before meeting him. He would never see you grow into yourself, like a baby deer with shaking legs finally learning how to trot a little less clumsily. Romeo would never be part of a whole chunk of your past, and deep inside, it upset him.

And the fact that he was upset made him scowl ever harder. His fingers unconsciously pressed down on your skin more forcefully, and you winced.

"Hey, don't use so much strenght." You murmured, holding his wrist with one hand. Romeo clicked his tongue, shaking you off.

He grabbed another cotton pad and applied a dab of moisturizer, resuming his ministrations with less intensity.

And with them, his eyes focused on you again: on the dark circles under your eyes and your darker eyelids. On the fine smile lines on the sides of your lips and the bunny lines on the bridge of your nose. He analyzed every patch of discoloration and hyperpygmentation on your face with some sort of secret reverence that he wished eluded him, but didn't.

After all, you lived through joy, sorrow, anger, and despair, and your skin told your story to those who could see it up close. You were an open book for him, someone who could read the words carved in every little detail of your face. He could almost claim he knew you best just from that. What he didn't know, however, was if you were brave or just plain stupid.

Romeo knew his flawless appearance wasn't exactly the blueprint for courage. He donned a mask of perfection in order to stay in control: to control how others saw him and to control how he saw himself. The more poreless and uniform his skin was, the more things could stay the same, with money in his pockets and people under his command.

And so, he hid his traumas under retinol serum and rosehip oil and infrared lights. Fake it till you make it, or so his mother would say after it all came crashing down.

Romeo knew better than anyone else that he couldn't be as vulnerable as you. Vulnerability would mean assuming his losses and bequeathing the only power he had.

So if that meant you were just a bit stronger than he was, just a bit more courageous than he was, then maybe – maybe – he could quietly admit to himself that he admired you.

He would never ever say that to your face, though. Fuck no. That would never be his brand.

#character analysis #????? I think???? not sure #this idea just came to me right before bed last night and I had to write it before I forgot about it lol #this is not beta read nor edited so if it's a mess I'm sorry #and sorry for the abrupt ending lol I just didnt have much to say after that #tokyo debunker #romeo scorpius lucci #tokyo debunker romeo lucci #now Im gonna take a nap #a mimir

146 notes · View notes